Fix You
by MaryFriends
Summary: Ross moved to London with Emily, having accepted not to see Rachel anymore. Then, after almost four years, he returns to New York for Monica's wedding.
1. Chapter 1

**First of all I want to thank you guys for your suggestions and I really appreciate your encouraging words. I ended up choosing a storyline Debbie suggested me a while ago. I hope you like it!**

**Things you need to know before reading this:**

**-Ross stayed married to Emily and moved to London with her.**

**-He accepted her one condition of not seeing Rachel again.**

**-This takes place around the end of season 7, some time before Monica's wedding.**

**-The story will be written from Ross' point of view. I did that with Rachel in Addiction and I wanted to try the same with Ross for a change.**

**- There will be a few references to some events in the show. **

**PS: I'm so bad at making up titles so I chose Fix You because it is one of my fav Coldplay's songs and I think it sort of fits the story.**

**FIX YOU**

"_So…you're definitely leaving tomorrow?" my sister looks at me as though I was leaving for a war and I might not return ever again. I smile in spite of the sadness I am feeling._

"_C'mon don't look at me like that, I don't have a choice, my life is there…" The corner of her lips curl downwards and her eyes water a bit. It breaks my heart seeing her so miserable on her weeding day but I have no idea what to do to make it better, all I can do is wrap my arms around her. "Hey, don't cry. I promise I will come more often, and you can come visit whenever you feel like it."_

"_I'm going to miss you so much." _

"_Me too." I lift my eyes and I spot her a few feet away, leaning on the doorframe of that hallway we are in. I don't know how long she's been staring at us, but there is something different in her eyes, something that wasn't there yesterday. I look away and kiss my sister's head before we break apart. I feel her approach us but I don't raise my eyes. "We should go back to the ballroom." I tell Monica, who nods her head in agreement. _

"_Ross, can I talk to you for a moment?" she asks rather timidly. Her arms are folded across her chest with her nails slightly sinking in her arms. She seems uneasy, which makes me doubt this is the same Rachel from the last few weeks. Monica looks back and forth at us and then decides to take a few steps away from me._

"_I'll…go check if Chandler has found some proper shoes. See you later." She tells me. In a matter of seconds we are alone, standing opposite each other in silence. I already feel the tension building up and we haven't exchanged one single word yet. _

"_What is it?" I finally ask, clearing my dry throat. She presses her lips in a hard line and her neck turns to have a glance at the ballroom, where Monica is now, speaking with other guests._

"_I can't believe you're going to do it." She says looking back at me._

"_What."_

"_You're gonna leave just like that?….you're not even going to tell your sister the truth?" _

"_That's not your problem." Her arms drop to her sides as she shakes her head from side to side in clear disapproval. _

"_You're making a huge mistake."_

"_Why do you even care? I thought you wanted me as far away from here as possible." I say, reproducing her own words, which she said to me no more than twenty hours ago. _

"_I'm not talking about me; I couldn't care less about what you do." _

"_Then, mind your own business." She stares at me with such intensity that I can almost feel my skin burning with her hate._

"_You're such a coward." I let out a puff of air that shows my annoyance. I don't understand her. _

"_Is that all you wanted to tell me? Because I don't want to argue with you again, It's my sister's wedding, I want to be at peace." _

_She briefly looks down and sighes._

"_Yes. That's all." _

**6 weeks earlier…**

"Please, tell me you're coming." My sister's pleading tone makes my stomach tie in painful knots.

"Mon, I'd really like to, but it is a very busy time of the year at work." I lie, and I feel bad for doing so but it's the only way to get out of this situation.

"But it's my wedding, Ross. I can accept that you haven't been able to come the past few Thanksgivings or Christmases. But are you really going to miss the happiest day of my life?"

"I-"

"Listen, you don't even need to stay for a week, just a couple of days is enough. But I need to see you there near me…you're my only brother." I take a deep breath.

"Alright…I'll go."

…

_C'mon, lift your hand and press the damn button! It's your sister, she'll be happy to see you. _I cheer myself after five minutes of standing in front of that door I have crossed so many times. Just when I am about to hit the button a stranger holds the door open for me with a polite smile. Mumbling a "Thank you", I enter the building and begin to climb the stairs.

I grab the knob and hesitantly turn it; it's open, as it always used to be. I take a step in and find my sister working in the kitchen, typically. I have no idea what to say, so I knock on the door to catch her attention.

"Chandler I don't have time to joke around, bring that chicken already!" she says right away, not even taking a glimpse at the door.

"I'm sorry, if you're busy I can come back later…" the wooden spoon she was holding drops to the floor, getting everything dirty with tomato sauce, but to my surprise she doesn't even flicker. She turns around and the moment she meets my eyes I regret having been away from her for such a long time.

"Hi" I mumble, closing the door behind me and not sure whether I should stand in here or get closer. After a few seconds, her face lights up and she runs to me.

"Ross! I can't believe you're here." she hugs me tightly before slapping my chest in her own fashion. "Why didn't you tell me you were coming!?"

"Well, it was a spur of the moment decision."

"But the wedding isn't in another six weeks, you're staying for the wedding right? Do not tell me you're not!" she threatens with her finger against my chest.

"I am. I'll be here until your wedding."

"Oh my god, that's great!" she hugs me again, and I envelop her with my arms. "How long has it been since we last saw each other? A year and half? That's way too long, Let's sit down, we have so much to talk about!" She then grabs my hand and leads me to the table and I can't help letting out a small chuckle at her enthusiasm.

"What about the dinner?"

"That can wait, besides I still have to wait for Chandler to bring the chicken. Water?" she asks heading to the sink.

"Yeah, thanks."

"By the way, where's Emily?" she asks as she returns to the table with two glasses. I take a long gulp.

"She had to stay in London, but she'll come for the wedding."

"Good, send her regards when you talk to her."

"Will do."

"So tell me, what's new with you?" _What's new? What do you say to that when you've been out of the loop for so long?_

"Not much…life is still the same…and work is going really well, although very busy. Thankfully I managed to find a substitute so I'm able to stay for a while."

"That's great."

"Yeah, so…what about you?"

"Well… I'm getting married in a month and a half!" she nearly screams. I grab her hand with a genuine smile.

"I could not be happier for you, Mon. I really am." Before she can say a word the door opens.

"Honey…I'm home." Chandler says cheerfully, holding the chicken up in the air and carrying a few plastic bags in the other hand. He momentarily freezes when he sees me, his eyes and mouth wide open in surprise. Then he walks a few steps backwards and closes the door to open it again. "Did our apartment move itself to London?" he says, clearly stunned by my presence.

"Nope, I did." I say, standing up from the chair. He smiles widely.

"Dude, Are you really here?" he puts everything on the counter and walks towards me " Is this real?" I look down at myself.

"I think so."

"This is awesome!" We hug and tap each other on the back. "You didn't come to stop my wedding though, did you?" I chuckle.

"No, It's still kind of weird for me but I'm glad you guys are together…and happy." They smiled at each other.

(…)

"I should leave now," I say after a while "it's four in the morning for me and I don't want to pass out before getting to the hotel."

"What are you talking about? A hotel ? you're staying here."

"What? No, Monica, I don't want to disturb you, I'm sure you guys have quite some busy weeks ahead, I do not want to be another burden."

"You won't be a burden, I'll be happy to have you here. Besides, six weeks at a hotel? It's going to cost you a fortune! No, no, you're staying here and that's the end of it." She insists.

"Yeah, man, we'd love to have you here." Chandler adds, tapping my shoulder. I take a glimpse of** her** room.

"But…won't it be awkward with…her here?" It's been so long that I cannot even bring myself to pronounce her name.

"Oh." Monica says realizing the problem. "That won't be a problem, Rachel doesn't live here anymore. Now it's our guest room." What do you mean she doesn't live here? Where is she? How is she? I want to ask a thousand questions, but it wouldn't be appropriate.

"Okay then. I'll…come back tomorrow morning with my things."

"Great!"

….

**There you have a little bit of future, past and present. **

**Any Thoughts on this first chapter? **


	2. Chapter 2

**Wow! Thank you so much for your reviews and support everybody! I hope I don't let you down with this story.**

**Here's chapter two, it's a bit of a filler but I promise the next ones will be better.**

**Thanks for reading and please keep the comments coming, you guys inspire me to go on.**

**Enjoy!**

…**..**

**Chapter 2.**

The next day I wake up just as the sun is rising and, inevitable, my first thought goes to her. Monica's words haven't left my wandering mind. _Did she mean she doesn't live in the apartment or that she left the city altogether?._ I put my arms behind my head and stare at the plain white ceiling, trying to make up her face. It's easy; her features are engraved deeply in my memory. It is her voice what I have forgotten.

A part of me is desperate to find her, to hear the sound of her voice again, while the other one just yearns to run away before that moment happens. Although I know it is unavoidable, that sooner or later I will have to face her, if it's not now then it'll be at the wedding. A loud groan leaves my mouth, expressing my frustration caused by these conflicting thoughts that have been bugging me ever since I boarded that plane.

I hastily get up and get dressed to go for a walk and hopefully clear my mind.

I stroll along the streets of my old neighborhood with a bittersweet sensation. New establishments have replaced old ones; the old video store I used to go to is now a fancy restaurant, and the small grocery store I shopped at has been turned into another coffee shop. Without realizing, I end up in front of Central Perk. I stand in there as people go in and rush out with a coffee in their hands, probably heading to their workplace.

Nostalgia immediately washes over me as soon as I step in that familiar coffee shop. Aside from the goods on the counter, everything looks exactly the same as the last time I was there four years ago. I scan the place before going any farther. "Our" couch is occupied by complete strangers and so is every single spot in the place. There is not one single familiar face except for Gunther, whose peculiar hair doesn't seem to have changed a bit in these four years.

"Good morning, Gunther." He looks up from his notepad at me with evident surprise.

"Ross?" I give him a polite smile.

"Good to know I haven't been forgotten around here." Although I've always found this man to be sort of odd and sometimes inexplicably unfriendly towards me, it makes me happy to be recognized. "How are you?"

"I'm fine, thanks. It's nice to see you here again. Can I get you anything?"

"Yeah, a cappuccino would be fine, thanks."He turns to the coffee machine and returns little after. "Here you have."

"Thank you." I grab the mug and take a sip of the hot liquid. I keep the mug on my lips for a moment, waiting for him to move to another client but he stays there, observing me quietly, which begins to make me feel uncomfortable.

"So, how's Rachel?" he finally speaks. I frown at his unexpected question. I slowly put the mug down and clear my throat.

"I…um…I don't know. I haven't seen her in a while. Why?"

"Oh…I thought you guys were together." I frown again.

"No. I moved to London with my wife. What made you think that?" he shrugs.

"You both stopped coming here around the same time…I figured you had gone somewhere together. But I'm glad to know that wasn't the case." He says with a weird grin.

"She doesn't come here anymore?" the question leaves my mouth as I am thinking it.

"No...the rest come all the time, but she's probably been here a couple of times in the last three years." He stands in there, probably expecting me to tell him something but when I don't he moves away to attend a new customer. And, again, my curiosity grows bigger.

(…)

12.00 Sharp I turn in the key to my room and leave for Monica's apartment. The cab ride doesn't take more than fifteen minutes.

"Hey brother," she exclaims with joy as soon as she opens the door. I smile widely, feeling at home.

"Hi" I give her a hug, followed by a peck on her cheek. "How are you?"

"Very well, and you?"

"Tired, I'm trying to deal with this damn jet lag. I hope I'm not late?" I say, noticing the already neatly set table.

"No, you're right on time; I assumed you'd take your time leaving the hotel room." I smile.

"You know me too well."

"Unfortunately." She adds, clearly joking. "The food will be done in a few minutes. Why don't you go get comfortable? and I'll call you when everything's ready"

"Yeah, thanks."

I pull my suitcase into the bedroom and begin to unpack my clothes and some toiletries that I picked from the hotel. After a while, I sit on the bed and cannot help observing that room that was once hers. Monica did a good job remodeling the room; there is nothing left in this place that may indicate she ever lived here…even the color of the walls has changed from pink to a light green. I shake my head, in an attempt to get rid of her memory. I knew coming here would bring back past memories but I never imagined it would be this difficult to enter some place without associating it to her. I close my eyes tightly and remind myself that I am here for Monica and not to see _her_.

(…)

"Where is Chandler?" I ask sitting down at the table where there are only two plates.

"At work, he has lunch there almost every day."

"So…how is he dealing with all the wedding planning? One of these days you'll have to explain to me how you managed to change his mind about commitment." She laughs and I soon join her recalling how in the past just hearing that word would make him sick.

"Actually, very well I'd say, although I'm taking care of everything myself; there's no reason for him to freak out…yet." She says, lifting her hand with her fingers crossed.

"And, how are the rest? do they hate me?" I ask, adding a smile but deep down that is my biggest worry. After all, I promised to keep in touch but I never did.

"Of course not! We all love you, don't be silly."

"I don't know…"

"I swear to you. I told them this morning about you being here and they're dying to see you." _All of them?_

"So am I"

"Hey, why don't we plan something for the weekend? We all could go to a restaurant or we could meet here and have a barbecue like we used to! Yeah, let's do that!" she exclaims, her excitement growing as she thinks of new ideas. "What do you say?"

"Well, if everybody is available then…I'd love to." I stretch my lips into a smile while I feel my hands start to sweat.

"Great! I'll let them know tomorrow." She smiles, patting my hand a few times with enthusiasm.

"But I need you to bring me up to date, for example…what's going on with Phoebe?"

"Phoebe? Well Phoebe's is Phoebe, still free as a bird and working as a freelance masseuse."

"Does she still play at Central Perk?"

"Yeah, but not as often as she used to. Thankfully." We chuckle.

"How about Joey?"

"Joey….He's doing great, still the same Casanova you know. Oh! And he's back in Days of Our Lives!"

"Really? Didn't his character fall down an elevator shaft and crashed his skull?"

"Yup, but they transplanted somebody else's brain into his body." I arch an eyebrow at the messed up plot "I know. Anyway, the thing is he's making a lot of money so Chandler doesn't need to lend him money anymore, which is a huge relief I must say, becau…." She keeps speaking but suddenly her voice fades away when something on the fridge catches my attention. It is a photo of Monica with _her_. They both are wearing fancy clothes and the biggest smile on their faces. She looks absolutely stunning.

The feeling of my sister's hand over mine brings me back to the conversation.

"I'm sorry, what were you saying?" she gives me a small smile.

"What do you want to know?" I give her an inquiring look.

"What?"

"About Rachel. You were paying more attention to her photo than to what I was saying." Impulsively, I look at it again.

"I'm sorry. I didn't realize." I look down and grab the fork to take another bite of Monica's delicious chicken.

"She is fine as well." Monica says after a while. I meet her eyes and smile nonchalantly "You know, she works for Ralph Lauren now."

"Really? That's amazing."

"Yeah, it's unbelievable how far she's come….if eight years ago we had been told that this would happen I'm sure none of us would've bought it." She says with a chuckle and I smile but silently disagree with her. I always knew she could make it.

"Yeah…It's incredible." silence breaks through our conversation. I want her to go on but I do not say or ask anything because I know I shouldn't. I chose to leave, cutting her off my life; I do not deserve any answers. However, there's something I cannot help but to ask.

"Does she still hang out with you?" she gives me a funny look.

"Of course she does, why do you ask?"

"Because…I was in Central Perk this morning and…Gunther asked me about her…he said she no longer goes there. Is that true?"

"Yeah well, I don't know exactly why…she and her fiancé prefer to go to this new place a couple of blocks away instead." My hand freezes halfway between the plate and my mouth.

"Rachel is engaged?" I needlessly ask, unable to hide my surprise. Her eyes widen.

"Yeah…didn't I tell you? She actually got engaged a month before Chandler and I did."

"Wow…It seems like things have quite changed since I left, uh?..."

"Well, it's been four years…everything is different."

...


	3. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER 3**

"Well, it's been four years…everything's different."

"Right." I look down at her hand still on mine and half smile. For some reason I had ignored -perhaps intentionally- that life also goes on for those you leave behind.

"I haven't told her yet that you're here." She says, pouring some more water into her glass. I look up and our eyes meet. "How are we going to do this?" she asks, expressing her concern, but before I can say anything she continues. "I'm sorry for Emily, but Rachel is definitely coming to the wedding; she is my best friend AND bridesmaid so Emily will have to cope with you two being in the same room." I grab her hand and squeeze it gently.

"Don't worry about it. I talked to her before coming here and she's okay with it. She knew it'd have to happen at some point," a gleeful smile instantly appears on her face. "Besides…it's been four years, if this hasn't been enough to convince her then I don't know what would."

"You have no idea how happy it makes me to hear that." The enthusiasm in her voice is contagious and I smile. "So do you think I could invite her to the barbecue as well? I would really love for all us to be there." I inhale as I think for a second and then shrug my shoulders.

"If she wants to, why not."

"Why wouldn't she?"

"After what I did? I doubt she cares about me at all." I realize my chuckle has sounded rather cheerless when she tilts her head and grabs my hand again.

"I'm not going to lie to you…she was devastated when you left, we all were, but Rachel…she turned into a different person…" I can't help the deep guilt that her words make me feel. "But hey! she's happy now, she's moved on and I assure you she will be glad to know you're back." She squeezes my hand once again and I force a smile.

"I hope so."

**Friday.**

I had all day yesterday and this morning to try to get rid of this nervousness that's been eating me alive since Monica confirmed she was coming. However, I've failed dramatically. If anything, my deplorable state has done nothing but increase as the clock ticks closer to the agreed time. And to make things "less" awkward her fiancé will come too; her rich and successful fiancé, with whom she now lives in a large apartment in Park Avenue, according to Monica.

"Can I help you with anything?" I ask my sister as I leave my temporary bedroom, unable to stay any longer within those four walls.

"Nah, that's alright. I have everything under control here, thanks." She flashes me a brief smile. "Oh, why don't you go help out Chandler? He has already thrown three burgers out the balcony trying to flip them. I'm seriously worried we're gonna run out of food." I chuckle and make my way toward the balcony.

"Hey dude, need hel-?" I froze when he shushes me with his finger against his lips. I watch him while he tries to steady the spatula on his other hand and then throws the burger upwards. The meat flips a few times in the air before giving in to the force of gravity and falling, hitting the barbecue on the way down and landing flat on the floor. "OWW, Almost!"

"CHANDLER!" Monica scolds from inside.

"Sorry!" he replies, picking it up from the floor and putting it back on the grill.

"EW, dude!"

"What? That one will be for Joey." I pull a face of disgust.

"Are you seriously going to let him eat that?"

"The guy has eaten BOOKS. I'm sure he won't mind a little extra substance in his burger." I shook my head to erase the image off my mind.

"Anyway, give me that." I say taking the spatula from his hand "I'll show you how it's done." I put the burger that fell on a corner and cautiously flip the rest. I smile proudly, surprised that I haven't forgotten the technique after so long.

"Nice." He pats my back. "Beer?"

"Sure." he grabs two bottles from the cooler and hands me one. We take a long gulp at once and then smile in silence.

"So, nervous about seeing Rachel?" I glance at him. "I know I would be…if I were in your situation." He adds. I shrug keeping my eyes on the grill.

"A little…I have no idea what to expect. I'm just concerned that she might not want to talk to me and things will get awkward."

"Everything will be okay, you'll see." He rests his hand on my shoulder and rubs it reassuringly. "And if not, you can always count on me to make the dinner awkward for everybody." I laugh, well aware that he has an innate talent to do that.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Of course, ask away." I take out the burgers that are done, put some more on the grill and turn to look at my friend, who is giving me a curious look.

"How is this guy? …Marco is it?"

"Yes, Marco." he quietly nods before proceeding. "He's….nice; he is this top executive at some very famous Italian clothing line-"

"So he is in fashion as well." I state.

"Yes. His father is the owner of the company and I'm risking my masculinity saying this but, the guy is stunning." I laugh even though I can feel jealousy growing back in me.

"Another Italian, huh?"

"Yup, can't get rid of them. But be aware, this one speaks perfect English."

"Damn it!" I joke to hide my discomfort. "So it seems Rachel hit the jackpot with this guy..."

"Certainly."

"Ross!" a familiar voice puts an end to our conversation. I glance at the window and spot Joey coming out.

"Joey!" I imitate his tone. I put down the spatula and meet him in a manly hug. "Nice to see you again man." He was the last one to visit me in London seven months ago and perhaps that is way it doesn't feel awkward.

"Same here, it was about damn time you visited us!"

"Yeah, I know." I look down to hide my shame. "Hey! I heard you're back on Days of Our Lives! Congratulations!"

"Thanks! It's awesome, right?!" he says with a smile of pure joy.

"Beer?" I offer.

"Do you even need to ask?"

"Here." I hand him one with a genuine smile.

"Thanks!" I grab the spatula and flip the new burgers. "So, how are the burgers going?" he asks eagerly.

"They'll be ready soon, you hungry?" Joey stares at me.

"Have you forgotten ME? I'm always hungry!"

"Here, this one is for you." Chandler intervenes, putting the one that fell into a piece of bread and giving it to him. Joey immediately takes a bite at it, which makes my stomach turn.

"Thanks man!" He says, chewing hard. "This is awesome! The three of us together again, ah? ah?" he says, effusively wrapping his arms around our shoulders.

"Yeah, yeah, enough with the touching, Joe." He shots him a stare.

"Why so manly all of a sudden? feeling ashamed of what happened the other night?" we both look at him intrigued.

"What are you talking about?"

"Monica told me you shed a couple of tears the day Ross arrived." He teases.

"I did not!"

"Oh yes you did."

"Alright, so I did, where is the problem? Ross has been my best friend since college and I've missed him." He reproaches. I smile, flattered by his words.

"I've missed you too, man." We smile at each other and join in another hug. Out of the blue, someone begins to hum a ballad and when we turn there is Phoebe standing by the window, accompanied by some stranger.

"You guys are so cute." We all greet her at once. "Ross! So good to see you."

"Hi Phoebe." We hug with a wide smile. I'm still surprised at how natural it feels to be around them again. I look at her as we break apart "You look beautiful!"

"Well, obviously." She says with a roll of eyes that makes me chuckle. "I'm so happy you're here!" the honesty in her voice makes me happy to be there.

"So am I, it is nice to be back home." She strokes my left arm and suddenly the smile on her face fades.

"um….is everything okay?" she frowns and I follow suit.

"Yeah everything's great. Why?"

"You sure? I sense some negativity around you." She gives me that special look of hers that seems capable of going through your skull and reading your thoughts without your consent. I clear my throat and force a smile.

"I am sure. You may be sensing my lack of sleep. I can't seem to get rid of the London time." She gives me an unconvinced look "You're not going to cleanse my aura, are you?" She smiles.

"Nah. Give me another hug, I've missed your geeky ass, Geller." I chuckle loudly and we hug again. The stranger, who came with her, clears his throat obviously to draw her attention. "Oh sorry! Ross, this is Mike, my boyfriend. Honey, this is Ross, the friend I told you about the other day?"

"Ow, you're the one who said the wrong name at the altar?" he says amused, extending his hand towards me "That was hilarious!"

"Yup, that one. How are you?" I shake his hand reluctantly.

"I'm fine, thanks."

"Anyway…the burgers are done." I announce. "And we should probably go back inside because it is getting crowded out here."

"Yeah, let's go in."

As we are walking inside, the door to the apartment opens and _she _walks in, holding hands with a tall, blonde, green-eyed man.

"Hi everybody!" there it is, her beautiful voice. I stand still by the fridge, my heart beating unreasonably fast, while the rest walk over to greet her. "Are we late? The traffic was a pain today." I manage to hear her tell them. I take advantage of my apparent invisibility to observe her. Her hair is shorter, just above her shoulders, but other than that she looks exactly like four years ago.

Her eyes finally find me and I freeze, until she sends the warmest smile my way. "Hey, Ross." She says in a sweet tone that throws me off completely. I'm so taken aback by her reaction that it takes me a while to reply.

"Rachel…Hi." I want to walk but my feet prefer to stay glued to the floor so it is her who approaches me and to my surprise, she wraps her arms around me. The scent of her hair inundates my nose and it is enough for my mind to bring back amazing but equally painful memories from the past. I want to squeeze her into my body and kiss her hair but the embrace only lasts a couple of seconds.

"How are you?" she asks as we break apart. "What a surprise you gave us!" I open my mouth but I have no idea what to say. This is certainly not the hostile encounter I had pictured in my mind.

"I'm good…thanks. You?" I ask, but before she has the chance to answer, the attractive man she came with approaches us.

"Honey, aren't you going to introduce us?" he whispers near her ear, resting his arm on the small of her back.

"Of course, Honey, this is Ross Geller…an old friend." He looks at me as if never having heard my name before. "He is also Monica's brother."

"Oh hi, nice to meet you Ross, I'm Marco Bellini." His honest smile is enough to prove she has not told him about me and I cannot help but wonder why.

"Nice to meet you too, Marco." I smile politely and we shake hands. "Monica told me you guys got engaged…Congratulations."

"Thanks," they say at once, gazing into each other's eyes. I look down uncomfortable.

"Okay okay, enough with the talking. Everybody, please take a seat, the food is ready and I do not want it to get cold." My sister says. I take the closest seat to the fridge, hoping to be far enough from them but to my luck she ends up opposite me.

(…)

"So Ross, how come Emily didn't come with you?" Phoebe asks a few minutes into the dinner. All eyes focus on me. I put down my cutlery and clear my throat uncomfortably.

"She…couldn't take so many weeks off work, but she says she will see you guys at the wedding and she sends regards to everybody." Everybody smiles, except her, who is giggling and whispering something into her fiancé's ear, both totally oblivious to the conversation.

"And how is life going in London? When can I come over again?" Joey asks with enthusiasm.

"Anytime Joey, you're always welcome. And it's going well, we recently moved to a house in East London."

"Does that mean there are babies on the way?" Phoebe asks teasingly. I smile.

"Yeah, brother?"

"Nope, no babies on the way. To be honest we haven't actually talked about it yet…these past four years have flown by"

"Well, talk about it. I want a nephew with a cute British accent."

"I already gave you Ben, when are YOU guys going to give me a niece or nephew?" I ask staring at Chandler to make him uncomfortable and I know I have succeeded when he almost chokes on his burger.

"Freak out all you want. It is going to happen." Monica tells him firmly. Chandler mumbles something incoherent, which makes everybody laugh. I sigh relieved that their attention has shifted to somebody else.

"Let the guy breathe, Monica, you don't want to scare him before the wedding is over," Phoebe's boyfriend comments. They laugh and continue to share anecdotes from their engagement party but I can't pay attention because all my energy goes to trying to suppress the temptation to look at her. However, it isn't long before I give up and look her way.

As if having felt the weight of my eyes on her skin she looks back at me and a weird sensation settles at the pit of my stomach. She holds my gaze and suddenly their voices die away and it is just she and I looking at each other. She smiles and I melt, until her fiancé comes into scene to kiss her cheek. I immediately look down, feeling embarrassed.

"So Rachel, Marco, what about you guys, has you set a wedding date yet?" Monica asks, I grab the fork and knife again and concentrate on my plate.

"We've been considering a couple of dates, but nothing official yet." Rachel says.

"I want to elope but the miss here wants a traditional wedding."

"I'm sorry honey, but rushing a wedding is always a mistake." Although she probably didn't mean to, her words hurt me a little. "Besides I want to enjoy the process of planning my wedding."

"I agree with her. Planning a wedding can be stressful but also very rewarding."

"See?"

The sound of my phone startles me and I cannot be more thankful that it rang on the right moment.

"Excuse me. I'll be right back." I head toward the balcony and pick up the call. "Yes? Oh…hi. Yup I'm here. I don't know. I'm pretty sure I left them in the mailbox. Well, check. Alright. Bye."

I hang up the phone and rest my forearms on the balustrade, trying to make time. Although our relationship ended long ago and I moved on, I can't bear the pain of going back there and listen to her plan her life with another man.

….

**That's the end of chapter 3! This fic is just beginning. Do you think is it going too slow? What's your opinion on this chapter? Let me know please :D**

**Also, I want to clarify something. In the previous chapter Ross said he didn't keep in touch with them but what I truly wanted to express was that he didn't see them as often as he had promised. He saw each of them (except Rachel) a few times here and there during the four years. **


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER 4**

"Hey Ross, what was the name that very cool pub you took me to in London?" Joey asks me as I return inside after a few minutes.

"Camel?"

"That's the one! I was telling them about that time you got so hammered on our way home you stripped down to your underwear while singing I Will Survive at the top of your lungs." he recalls in between chuckles. Everybody breaks into laughter and I instantly flush, having no recollection whatsoever of that night, apart from the worst hangover I've ever experienced and the subsequent cold I had for days.

"Yeah, thanks for sharing that."

"ROSS did that? Man! I would've sold a kidney to see that." Chandler says. I smile uncomfortably.

"It wasn't my proudest moment..."

"So Ross, How long have you been living in London for?" Marco asks through the persistent laughter.

"It will be four years next month."

"Wow," he turns to Rachel "Honey, we've been to London twice, how come you didn't tell me you had a friend living there? We could've stopped by." She clears her throat, shifting in her seat.

"Well, you know…our trips were kind of short and…Ross is always very busy, we would've only bothered him." She says motioning her hands aimlessly, this time, not even glancing at me once.

"I'm sure that's not true, right Ross?" I smile politely.

"It would've been my pleasure to have you over." She looks at me with a forced smile.

"Maybe next time," She says and I can tell my words have annoyed her "by the way, Joey? Didn't you have something to share with us?" she quickly changes the topic, turning her head to Joey who is seating next to her. He puckers his lips and shakes his head.

"No…"

"Yeah…it was something about a party…I think?" She insists, widening her eyes at him. He shoots her a look.

"Yeah, okay." He wipes his hands on the napkin and puts it down next to his plate. "Here's the thing, I'm throwing a party for my colleagues to celebrate that I'm back in Days of our Lives… and I was wondering if you would like to come too."

"That's a genuine invitation." Chandler comments with his usual sarcastic tone.

"Alright, Rachel caught me listening to a message from one of my colleagues and I couldn't get out of it!" he says annoyed.

"A Soap Opera party with all your actor friends? I'm there!" Monica exclaims with excitement.

"I really like you right now, Joey." Chandler added sarcastically.

"When is it?" asks Phoebe.

"Next Friday."

"I'm in, too."

"So am I, obviously." Rachel adds with a chuckle.

"Marco?"

"I'm afraid I can't, I will be in Milan all weekend for business."

"Oh my god, that's right! I forgot we were going to Milan…Do you mind if I stay this time? You know how much I like that show…" he smiles, passing an arm over her shoulders and stroking her left arm reassuringly.

"Of course, don't worry."

"Thank you." She whispers through a grin and cups his face to place a kiss on his lips. I look away, somehow ashamed.

"I'm going too. I want to make sure my wedding is still happening after that party." Chandler adds. Monica smiles, grabbing his hand.

"Sweetie, NOTHING will jeopardize our wedding." Pleased with her answer Chandler leans forward and plants a peck on her lips.

"What about you, Ross?" Joey asks me. For some reason I look at her before answering, wanting to make sure it will be okay with her. However, she is wearing an impassive look.

"Sure."

(…)

Phoebe and her boyfriend leave right after dessert and the rest of us move to the coffee table to have a few drinks.

"Shall we play some game?" Chandler suggests, taking the armchair. Monica, Rachel and her fiancé take seat on the big couch while Joey offers me the ottoman and then sits on the floor.

"Yeah! Let's play strip poker!" Joey exclaims rather excited. Monica and Rachel, who are across from us, send him a stare.

"Every time, Joey?" Monica points out.

"What? It's a fun game!"

"No it's not."

"How do you know if we never play?" She rolls her eyes.

"C'mon, let the guy play the game for once. It could be fun." Marco says. Rachel gives him a funny look.

"Since when are you interested in strip poker?"

"I don't know, I think it could be fun…something new to try." He whispers, nuzzling her neck. Rachel giggles and pushed him back playfully.

"Yeah! C'mon! let's play!" Joey insists, rubbing his hands together in anticipation.

"Forget it Joey, we're not playing." Monica puts an end to the discussion. Joey folds his arms in disappointment.

"We need new girlfriends around here." He hisses in my direction.

"Let's just talk." Rachel says, taking a sip of her wine.

"Let's talk about my wedding! I mean, our wedding." Monica grins.

"Yeah…I think I'm gonna take off." Joey says, pretending to stand up.

"Alright, alright, we'll talk about something else…"

"Let's talk about Ross." Marco says out of the blue. I flush, taken aback by this stranger's sudden interest in me. I look at my friends, who exchange uncomfortable looks. I clear my throat.

"What about me?"

"I don't know, up until yesterday I had no idea you existed. How did you meet these guys, for example?" I look at Rachel before proceeding, but again, there is no emotion or expression in her eyes.

"Well, as you already know Monica is my sister. Chandler and I became friends in college…I met Phoebe when she started living with Monica right here and I met you Joey around the same time when he became Chandler's roommate."

"And Rachel?" our eyes meet. She brings one of her hands to her hair and begins to twist one strand of her hair in between her fingers, clearly nervous about what I could possibly reveal.

"Uh… you know, Rachel has been Monica's best friend since they were two little girls…so I've basically known her all my life."

"Interesting..." I arch an eyebrow, but he doesn't continue.

"And how did you two meet?" I find myself asking.

"Do you want tell him yourself?" she shakes her head no.

"You do it; I like your version better." He arches an eyebrow.

"MY version? I thought we had the same version." She chuckles amused.

I only hear bits and pieces of their story since I can only pay attention to the way they interact with each other, how she gently rubs his leg without taking her eyes off him and how he kisses the side of her head every so often.

10.30 pm.

"We should probably go, right baby?" Rachel tells him, patting his knee.

"Yup, it's getting late." They both stand up simultaneously.

"Monica, thanks again for having us. Everything was delicious."

"My pleasure and thank you for coming."

"And Ross," he begins, turning to me and stretching out his arm. "It was nice meeting you." I shake his hand.

"Likewise,"

By 11pm everybody has left. Chandler is fast asleep on the couch while Monica is cleaning the coffee table. Despite feeling exhausted from the lack of sleep I prefer to stay in the living room. I stare at the TV while my mind keeps wandering back to her and her fiancé.

"Ross?"

"Yeah?"

"You okay?" my sister asks.

"Don't you think it's a little weird the way Rachel treated me today?" she frowns, having expected me to say something else.

"No…she was nice to you, wasn't she?"

"That's the thing. I thought she'll try to avoid me or be mad at me but…it's like she is a different Rachel or I am a different person for her, I don't know."

"She's grown up…I guess she figured that after so long it is useless to hold a grudge against you." I shrug unconvinced. "Well…the girls are coming with me to my last dress fitting tomorrow afternoon. We'll probably stop by the coffee house afterwards, why don't you meet us there and talk to her?"

….

The next day I arrive at Central Perk around 3pm. I sit on the couch and open the newspaper I bought across the street. I give up after a few paragraphs since the irrepressible shaking of my legs keeps distracting me.

I glance at my watch for the hundredth time in the past hour. Almost when I'm about to give up and leave, the door opens and the three girls walk in.

"Monica for the hundredth time, you look absolutely breathtaking." Rachel says with a roll of eyes. She spots me and smiles "Oh, hi Ross." She says, surprisingly cheerful. She puts the bags on the floor and walks toward the counter. "Coffee?"

"Yes please" Monica answers.

"A tea for me." Says Phoebe. "Hey Ross! How are you?" I fold the newspaper and leave it on the table.

"Fine, thanks. How did the dress fitting go?"

"Ugh, it was painful." I laugh at her expression.

"Excuse me?" Monica reprimands.

"You stood in there for two hours looking at yourself! It felt like an entire day."

"Do you also think we spent too much time in the store?" Monica asks Rachel as she returns to the table with the orders.

"Monica, the woman nearly called the police to get you down of there." Monica pulls a face of annoyance.

"Why do you complain? You two drank all the champagne they had in the store, for free!"

"And thank goodness there was champagne! Otherwise I wouldn't have survived." Phoebe adds.

"Okay, enough." I can't help but laugh

"Anyway, what about your day?" Phoebe asks.

"Great! I spent the morning with Ben."

"Aww, how is little Ben?"

"Not little anymore." I smile with a bit of sadness "He's great, getting taller and smarter every day." They all smile.

"How old is he again?" Phoebe asks.

"Excuse me; I need to use the bathroom." Rachel whispers, not wanting to interrupt the conversation. She sets her mug on the table and stands up.

"Almost 8." I mumble, following her with my eyes as she makes her way to the back of the café where the bathrooms are. When she has disappeared I glance at Monica.

"What?" I ask, confused by her intense gaze. I take the hint when she persistently points in the bathroom's direction with her eyes. I nod and stand up.

I lean on the wall next to the bathroom door and wait. My whole body is tense and my mind has gone completely blank. I silently damn myself for not having prepared something to say ahead of time. I took a deep breath and slide my hand inside my pocket, clutching the small box tightly.

My breath catches in my throat when the door finally opens a minute later. She stops briefly, surprised to see me there but soon enough she resumes her way and passes me by.

"Rachel wait." She stops at my words but a few seconds go by before she turns around.

"Yeah?" she asks, looking straight into my eyes, making my mouth dry out. I pull out my hand.

"I..I wanted to…give you this." She looks down at my hand and then back at me.

"What's this?"

"A little birthday present…I know I am a few weeks late…but better late than never, right?" I add a nervous chuckle. She exhales through her nose, looking down at the box shaking her head.

"What are you trying to do, Ross?" she asks serious.

"It's just a little present…"

"Well, you can keep it, I didn't open any of those other presents you had the nerve to send me and I certainly won't accept this one either." She turns around to leave but I grab her wrist before that can happen. I remain silent for a moment, realizing this is the first time I've touched her in all these years. I let go as she slowly turns around, when I find her eyes again, they're burning with rage.

"Do NOT touch again." She mutters through clenched teeth. I sigh.

"You're mad at me…" I state. She lets out a sarcastic chuckle.

"What did you expect?" the mask finally falls down and I find the Rachel I was expecting all along.

"Then why do you pretend everything is okay?" I ask helplessly.

"I'm doing it for Monica's sake, this is a very important moment in her life and I do not want to ruin it. But if you want me to be completely honest, I wish you had never appeared back." She throws the words at me with heartfelt hate. I look down, feeling defeated. "And by the way, how dare you make me look like an asshole in front of my fiancé?"

"I'm so sorry…I didn't know what to say…you hadn't told him anything about me, what was I supposed to tell him?"

"I don't know Ross!" she snaps "Perhaps that you have a busy schedule or that you travel a lot, anything! But no, you had to be 'nice Ross' and make me look like a bitch who doesn't care about her friends." I close my eyes tightly, unable to handle the pain that this situation triggers inside me.

"Please, calm down…Can we go some place and talk things through? I need to talk to you." I almost plead but her eyes remain unaffected.

"There's nothing to talk about. Until the wedding, If the guys are around I'll talk and be friendly to you but don't expect anything else from me. Just because now you're allowed to see me it doesn't mean I'm gonna let you return to my life just like that. No buddy, I have my life now, a wonderful one in fact, and I've made my peace with you not being in it." I hear her inhale, since I have my eyes fixed on the floor, unable to look at her. "So don't come now wanting to make this right because the door was closed long ago."

And just like that she walks away.

…..

**Sorry for the delay with this chapter, as it turns out writing a story from a male's point of view is more difficult than I actually thought, especially with so many characters involved. **

**Special thanks to chamucos, Debbie and pineapple for the detailed reviews. I love reading your opinions ;) and I'm glad you like my story so far. Any THOUGHTS on this one?**


	5. Chapter 5

**Before you proceed, I want to mention that in this story, Monica and Chandler's wedding will take place in late September. **

**CHAPTER 5**

I don't know how long I have been standing in that small hallway for, but I don't care either. I suddenly wish there was an exit door right there so I could leave without anyone noticing. How am I going to look at her now? Knowing that she hates me and she is just pretending in front of everybody else.

Five more weeks; I remind myself.

I fill my lungs with air and make my way back to the couch, trying to look as calm as I can. When I get there, Chandler and Joey have joined us.

"Hey, you've been in there for a while, you okay?" my sister asks concerned.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"Are you sure? You look kind of pale."

"It must be the hamburgers we ate last night. I had a rough night too." Joey comments, wincing and rubbing his stomach.

"I am okay. I was just making a call." I add a smile. She smiles back and resumes her conversation with Phoebe.

I sit down and my eyes inevitable search for her. She is holding her coffee in one of her hands while flipping through the pages of a random magazine, seemingly unaffected by what happened before. _How does she do it?_

"Hey!" Phoebe exclaims, catching everybody's attention. "Do you guys realize this is the first time we are having coffee together in…four years?" Phoebe says in amazement. We all smile with a bit of nostalgia. "I have to write a song about this moment!" she pulls out a notepad and a pen from her bag.

"I can't believe it's been that long. We should plan something to do together….just the six of us, without partners." Monica says.

"Well, that puts us in quite a tricky position, don't you think?" she gives Chandler a look and continues.

"So, what do you guys suggest?"

"We could go clubbing." Joey suggests.

"Aren't we a little old for that?" I comment. Everybody nods.

"Bunch of grampas" he murmurs.

"We should have a sleepover!" Phoebe smiles gleefully at her idea.

"Also very age-appropriate." Chandler says with sarcasm.

"Isn't that illegal after certain age?" Rachel adds with a chuckle.

"Probably not, but pathetic it is very." He answers.

"C'mon guys! I actually think it's a good idea! We could have some drinks; play games…talk all night long…like in the old times." Monica says with evident excitement in her voice. "And-and we could put away the couches and the coffee table and take out the mattresses and sleep all together in the living room." she adds.

"Now we're talking." Joey says with a grin on his face.

"I mean, sleep as in sleep Joey."

"Oh…but what's fun about that?" she rolls her eyes.

"So what do you say?"

"If Monica is willing to mess up her living room like that then we surely cannot reject this offer..." Chandler adds.

"Yeah, okay." Everybody agrees.

"Great, so what about next Saturday?"

"Can't. We have Joey's party." Rachel says.

"Oh, that's right. Well, the Saturday after that?" Everybody accepts. "Good, okay, honey let's go." She tells Chandler before turning to us. "We're trying the menu for the wedding today." She informs, smiling from ear to ear.

"I'm gonna go too, I have a client in less than an hour." Phoebe says.

As they leave, Marco enters the place, greeting everybody with a perfect smile. Rachel's face lights up and putting the magazine away she stands up.

"Hey Baby." She whispers while she wraps her arms around his torso and leans on her toes for a kiss.

"Hi Angel." Marco presses his lips against hers, hugging her tight. I look away and find the newspaper I had before. I pick it up and pretend to read it. "I'm gonna order a coffee, do you want something?" he asks her as they break apart.

"No thanks, I'm still finishing mine." She smiles and sits back.

"Hey Rach, can I borrow Marco tonight?"

"Joey, he's not a thing and I don't own him. Ask him yourself, and why do you need him?" she asks suspiciously.

"Because I'm going to a party tonight and I'd like for him to come. You have no idea how easy it is to pick up girls with him, that dude attracts the ladies like no other! Not even me!" Rachel's lips stretch forming a fake smile.

"Yeah, then it's a no."

"I gotta say," Marco begins as he returns and takes seat next to Rachel. "I was surprised when I got your message saying you were here." I lift my gaze and see her half-smile awkwardly.

"Everybody was here, so." Rachel shrugs her shoulders and sips at her coffee.

"She doesn't like coming here." Marco tells me.

"How come?" I automatically ask, unable to hold back my curiosity. Rachel eyes me with disguised annoyance.

"Actually, I have no idea…you've never told me why." Marco turns to her and she mumbles something incoherent.

"You do know why…it's 'cause I worked here and…it's kind of weird." She shrugs "Plus, I just like the other place better." She tries to excuse herself but I know there is not one truth in her words. Joey's phone rings and the attention shifts to him. He looks at the screen and his eyes widen to a scary point.

"Oh my god!" he exclaims.

"What's wrong?" Rachel asks, beating me to it.

"I forgot my sisters were coming this weekend! I was supposed to pick them up at the bus station! I Gotta go guys, bye!" He's gone before we know it.

I look at them and smile uncomfortably, realizing I am the only one left with them. I bring the coffee to my mouth as I force my brain to come up with a convincing reason that will allow me to leave but, being on holydays and having no other friends to meet with, nothing comes to mind.

"Ross, any plans for tonight?" Marco interrupts my thoughts.

"Em…no, nothing special."

"Rachel and I are going to the movies; Would you like to come with us?"

"What?!" Rachel exclaims but noticing the strange look on her fiancé's face she continues "I mean, god! I had forgotten we were doing that, wanna come?" she asks me politely, although her eyes are ready to shoot at me if I dare to say yes.

"Thanks, but I think I'm gonna stay at home, I have to be up early to pick up my son, I'm taking him to the zoo tomorrow." I lie.

"Aw well, we should do something together some time, like a dinner or something." He suggests with an amiable smile.

"That would be nice." I smile and return to my newspaper, silently praying that he won't make more questions. Thankfully, he turns to Rachel.

"By the way honey, it turns out I have to stay in Milan until Thursday, why don't you join me there after Joey's party and we check out some places for the wedding?"

"Er….I don't know… it's so far away…and you know how much I hate flying alone…can't we go some other time? We could go in November" she suggest in a sweet tone. I involuntary glance at them, I see her encircle his neck with her arms "and then we could fly out to the Canary Islands to relax and enjoy some sunshine," she whispers before kissing his lips gently. "What do you say?" he smiles broadly.

"I love that"

….

**Saturday.**

I put on the clothes I chose for the party: a white shirt, some grey dress trousers and dark belt and shoes. I hesitantly look at the few ties I brought. _Should I put one on? _Joey never mentioned anything about it being a fancy party but what if everybody's dressed up? I pick the grey one and tie it around my neck, loosening the knot a bit to make it a less formal look. Satisfied with the result, I grab the bottle of wine that I bought for Joey as a thank you and head to the door.

The phone rings. I stop and take a few steps back and answer it while putting my jacket on.

"Hello?"

"Ross?" it's my sister's voice.

"Yes, it's me. What's up? Are you at the party yet?"

"No, I have a little problem."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing big, don't worry. It's just that there was a problem in the kitchen and I'm running late. I was supposed to meet Rach in twenty minutes. I tried calling her but she doesn't answer the phone so I was wondering if you could pick her up…?"

"Wait, but…I don't even know where she lives…can't Chandler go?"

"No, he's already at the party helping Joey."

"Did you call Phoebe?"

"Actually no…I thought you'd be okay with it. Should I call her?" I sigh.

"That's alright. Give me her address." I write it down on a post-it note that Monica conveniently keeps near the phone.

"Okay."

"Thank you brother, see you later!"

I put the scrap of paper with her address inside the pocket of my jacket and leave the apartment.I sit still on the backseat of the cab, feeling my nervousness increase by the minute.

**Three**; those are the times I have seen and tried to talk to her this week.

On Monday, Joey and I were watching a game when she came in to drop something; Joey invited her to a drink and she stayed. Her eyes fell on me from time to time, but they looked right through me, as though I was invisible. Sometime later, Joey went into his room to get ready for a date, leaving us alone but the moment I was about to open my mouth, as if set up, her phone rang and she was out the door before I could do anything.

On Wednesday, we ran into each other in the hallway. I was leaving the apartment while she was walking up the stairs. She stopped and briefly smiled, which I took as a green light to speak, but then Marco appeared behind her and I lost my nerve.

Then on Thursday, she and Phoebe were helping Monica sort out the wedding invitations while I was in the living room watching some cartoons with Ben…

"_Good job girls, I'm actually impressed by how well you did everything. I think I'm gonna treat you to a coffee. What do you say?"_

"_Yeah!" they both say at the same time._

"_Great! Let's go."_

"_I'll be right over; I gotta go to the bathroom." I hear Rachel say._

"_Alright, we'll wait for you downstairs." A few seconds later, Rachel is in the bathroom and Monica and Phoebe are gone. _

"_Hey Ben, Would you like to play some videogames?"_

"_YEAH!" He yells, jumping off the couch._

"_But in my room, okay?"_

"_Okay." _

"_Your video game is in the second drawer of my desk." I wink my eye at my son and he runs off to my bedroom. I stand up and walk toward the bathroom. I hear the water running. She is about to go out so I place myself before the door, completely blocking her way. She rolls her eyes as soon as she sees me there._

"_Could you stop stalking me when I go to the bathroom?" _

"_Please" I put my palms together. "Listen to me for once."_

"_Get. Out." She hisses._

"_No." I firmly say. She arches her eyebrows and crosses her arms._

"_No? So what, you're just gonna stand in there?" she moves one hand to her hip, acquiring a challenging position. _

"_Exactly, I'm not letting you go out until you let me speak."_

"_Fine!" she slams the door and I hear her lock it. I frown confused._

"_What are you doing?"_

"_I'll wait here until Monica comes back."_

"_Are you serious?" she doesn't answer. "I can't believe you're doing this. I thought you were more mature than that!" I raise my voice but she remains quiet. "You're going to ignore me too?"_

"_I told you I didn't want to talk or know anything about you. So quit it!"_

"_C'mon…I understand you don't want to be friends with me anymore after what I did, but please let me first explain to you why-"_

"_I don't care!" she cuts me off._

"_Fine! I can see you are even more stubborn than you used to be! And just so you know, you weren't the only one who went through a hard time. I chose to leave yes, but it didn't make it any less difficult for me! But of course you're so self-involved you cannot see that!"_

"_Dad, what's wrong?" I hear my son's voice behind me. I instantly feel awful, having said all those things with my son so near. I turn around and force a smile into my face._

"_Noth…nothing's wrong, go back to the room."_

"_Why are you yelling at aunt Rachel?" he insists._

"_It..it's just that-" the door finally opens and she leaves the bathroom, quickly running her fingers under her eyes. Without looking at me, she kneels down before Ben and smiles._

"_Everything's fine Ben, your dad wasn't yelling at me, we were just fighting about a silly thing that happened the other day."_

"_What silly thing?"_

"_He…stole the last muffin from me, and it was my favorite flavor!" she tries to play down the situation but Ben furrows his eyebrows, not at all convinced."Hey Ben, would you like to come to the coffee house with me? Aunt Monica and aunt Phoebe are there."_

"_Yes! Dad, can I go?" he asks eagerly, grabbing Rachel's hand._

"_Sure…go ahead." _

_and again, she was gone._

I pay the driver and exit the cab. The temperature has dropped drastically since I left and the sky is now covered by huge dark clouds. I run to the door of the building where her apartment is, trying to escape the heavy raindrops that have started to fall.

I buzz once. No answer.

I buzz a second time. No answer either.

I hit the buzzer a third time, keeping my finger on it for a few seconds but nothing. I exhale exasperated as I lean on the wall and pull out my phone to call Monica but right then, I spot her walking hurriedly along the sidewalk in my direction. Her hair is tied on a small ponytail and she's wearing sunglasses even though it is almost dark outside.

She closes her umbrella and, as expected, she walks past me without muttering a word and inserts the key in the door.

"The sunglasses don't make you invisible, you know." She turns around, as if having just noticed my presence.

"What are you doing here?" she asks seemingly more surprised to see me there than angry.

"Monica…she had a problem at work. She couldn't reach you so she sent me here."

"Thank you, but I know the way; I'll go on my own." She says with indifference. She attempts to close the door but I stop her.

"I'm sorry but I'm not arriving to the party without you." She holds my stare through the lens of her sunglasses. "I promised Monica I'd pick you up." I add, knowing that if I mention Monica she won't be able to refuse.

"I'm not ready."

"I'll wait for you." She hesitates for a few seconds before speaking.

"Fine." She holds the door open for me.

We enter the elevator and she hits the 10th button. The door closes and there we are, within four small walls. I glance at her from the corner of my eyes. She is leaning on the opposite wall, looking straight ahead with her sunglasses still on while one of her feet taps the floor impatiently. My lips part with the intention to make small talk but nothing comes out. How am I going to talk to her after what I called her the other day?

"Take a seat or whatever." She says before disappearing into a corridor.

I observe my surrounds perplexed by the immensity of the apartment. High ceilings, walls covered with paintings, luxuries all around…I can hardly believe this is where she lives now. Even for someone like Rachel, who comes from a well-off family, this is too much. _Maybe she did change_.

She reappears after fifteen minutes, wearing a short red dress and her hair slightly wavy, my eyes stay glued to her amazing figure as she walks into a closet and grabs a matching jacket. She looks breathtaking.

"Let's go."

By the time we leave her apartment an intense thunderstorm has broken out, consequently there is not one single free cab in the street.

"What an awful storm," I break the long silence. She nods, raising her eyebrows. "Shall we walk? It isn't that far from here…" She looks at me as though I have said the dumbest thing in the word.

"Follow me."

We enter the building again and take the elevator down to the parking lot. I follow her closely as she makes her way to an astonishing black Porsche, which I assume belongs to Marco. Wordlessly, we get in and I glance at my watch. We're an hour late already.

We arrive shortly after given that the party is taking place at one of Joey's colleagues' penthouse in Midtown. We enter the elevator and I cannot keep quiet anymore, I need to talk to her before we get to the party and she forgets I exist again.

"Rach-" The lights suddenly go off and I hear her yelp as the elevator jolts, almost making us lose our balance. A soft emergency light goes on and I find her eyes, which seem to reflect my shock.

"What's…what's going on?" I say, feeling my heart pounding.

"I think we're stuck." She responds more calmly than me. She presses the alarm button several times. "Great, it doesn't work." I try to keep calm but I fail. I quickly pull out my phone to call the emergency services.

"No signal." I want to say, but it comes out in a whisper. I feel my throat begin to constrict, reducing the amount of air that enters my body. I gasp while the walls lose their form and my blood seems to abandon my veins. My vision blurs completely and my body loses its strength. I feel the wall trying to find something to hold onto.

"Ross!" I hear her voice in the distance, and then everything turns dark.

…..

Wow! So many reviews this time! Thanks **Marsha, Chamucos, Debbie, guest 1, guest 2, SophiaP, MsChanadlerBong26 and Pineapple.** You have no idea how much your words help me develop this story :) So thank you sooo much!

I am not 100% satisfied with this chapter but I hope you enjoy it. Let me know what you think **please**


	6. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER 6**

I emit a groan, confused and annoyed by the incessant shaking of my head.

"Thank god you're awake!" I hear her exclaim as she releases a sigh of relief. I lazily open my eyes and frown, trying to remember why I am sitting on the floor and why she is kneeling down next to me with her hands on my face. "Are you okay?" She asks with concern. I slowly nod my head. "What happened to you? Did you hurt yourself?" she continues, but her proximity and the fact that her hands are softly holding my face seems to have disabled my ability to speak. She eyes me intently but then, realizing what is going on, she drops her hands "You gave me a scare there" she says more calmly as she casually stands up, putting some distance between us. I rise to my feet as well and bring my hand to the back of my head to rub off the pulsating pain.

"Where…are we?" I manage to say after a long minute. Her hands fly to her face.

"Oh, god. Please don't tell me you've lost your memory!"

"No, no, I know we're in the elevator." I gulp at the thought of it. "I mean, why are we still here?" she exhales helplessly and leans on the wall.

"The storm has apparently caused a black out in half of Manhattan…and we are in that half." She shrugs with resignation.

"So…we're…stuck?" I say the words with tremor. She nods carelessly.

_Black out and Stuck _reverberate in my head andI feel my lungs start to fight for air again, something that doesn't go unnoticed by her.

"Hey, you okay?"

"I don't…really like being in closed spaces." I hastily admit with the little air that remains inside my lungs. My vision begins to blur again but a tight grip on my arm keeps me still.

"Hey hey hey, c'mon, you have to calm down." She waves her free hand in front of my face, producing a soothing current of air, which carries the sweet scent of her perfume. "Try to think about something else. They'll get us out of here soon, I talked to a man and he said the firemen were already on their way, so relax, take some deep breaths" I nod, following her instructions and focusing on her eyes, just her eyes. My heart rate slowly goes back to normal and my windpipe opens up, allowing me to breathe normally again. "Better?" she murmurs, letting go of my arm. I smile weakly.

"Yeah…thanks." She smiles back and for the first time I think she truly means it. She then returns to her previous position, leaning on the wall. I close my eyes and force my mind to control the fear and try to enjoy this moment alone with her that fate has granted me.

I turn around to look at my reflection in the mirror and realize my tie is completely loose and my shirt wet with the top buttons undone, exposing my chest. I touch my face and there are beads of water sliding down my face. I frown more confused. "Why is there water dripping from my head?" I ask her through the mirror; she motions her hands the way she does when she doesn't know what to say.

"You fainted…I didn't know what to do so I poured a bottle of water I keep in my purse on you to try to wake you up…I'm sorry." she shrugs with a sheepish look in her eyes.

"It's okay." I smile and turn around to face her.

"If people ask you can always say it was the storm." She shrugs cutely.

"Yeah, that'll be less embarrassing to explain." she smiles and I can't help but wonder if I'm inside a dream of mine; she is looking at me, talking to me without raising her voice or wanting to stab me with her eyes.

She sighs and glances at her watch.

"How long have we been here for?" I ask to avoid silence.

"Fifteen minutes. Do you think they're wondering where we are?"

"I don't know…but I would love to know how they're dealing with the black out at the party." She smiles and then looks down as she begins to play with her fingernails. I can't help but notice that her jacket is open, leaving her dress to view. My eyes travel down to her cleavage, where they linger for a while without my consent. My face warms up when I realize I've been staring and I silently pray she hasn't noticed. I quickly fix my eyes on my shoes for a few second to erase the previous image from my head.

As if intended, we both lift our heads at the same time and our eyes meet. I smile and she reciprocates. Although I don't want to make her uncomfortable, I hold her gaze because she seems pensive, as if wanting to say something. She opens her mouth but immediately closes it again.

"What" I encourage.

"Nothing…I was just…wondering. Since when are you claustrophobic?" she finally breaks the silence with her question, tilting her head to a side, which demonstrates her curiosity. I lift my shoulders.

"I guess since always."

"Ha…" she frowns, as if recollecting some lost memory. "But, We'v…we've been stuck in an elevator before…and you didn't seem to care." Her cheeks acquire a somewhat reddish shade or maybe it is just my excitement to know she's been thinking about our past which makes me see things. I smile timidly as I recall that rather steamy memory.

"That's because we were quite busy, I hardly had time to worry about that."

"Right," she looks down, and now I am sure she is blushing. "Why do you have a bottle of wine?" she changes the topic, as she always does when she is feeling embarrassed or uncomfortable. I follow her gaze and see the bottle lying next to my feet. I'm surprised it didn't break when I fell.

"I always carry it around, just in case I get stuck in the elevator with you," I joke. She smiles timidly. "Would you like some?"

"No, I'm okay." She declines with a movement of her hand. "Now, seriously, what's the deal with the wine?" she insists.

"It was a gift for Joey…but I'm not sure it's going to make it to the party…" I am tempted to open it and take a gulp to alleviate my thirst, but having not drunk a drop of alcohol in months it probably would not be such a good idea. "Can I ask you something?" she nods although unsure. "Why are you talking to me?" she arches an eyebrow. "I am not complaining, it's just that I am a bit surprised." I clarify.

"Well, I have no other choice, do I?" she says, but more amused than angry. "I think today made it pretty clear than running away from a problem is useless." She says, adding an innocent chuckle but her words hurt me more than she can imagine.

"You see me as a problem?" she tenses up and moves her lips, as if wanting to say something but not finding the words to.

"That's not what I meant, I-"

"Then, what did you mean?" She looks everywhere and nowhere, nervously. She takes a deep breath before looking me in the eyes.

"I didn't mean to call you a problem…" she calmly says. Instead of interrupting with more questions I let her go on "what I meant was that I find it funny how I've been trying to avoid you and now I am here stuck with you."

"I understood that, what I want to know is why you avoid m-"

"Do you think Monica has arrived yet?" She quickly tries to shift the attention again. However, I don't answer, I take a step forward to find her eyes and, without words, I let her know I'm waiting for an answer.

"Don't, please" she begs in a whisper, "I don't want to talk about it, let alone here" I contain a sigh of exasperation.

"Why not here? Because you cannot run away from me?" I retort. She remains quiet, which I understand as a chance to speak "Okay…I am aware that I did something terrible and hurt you doing so, but you know I had no other choice…it's not like I did it on purpose."

"It doesn't matter whether you did it on purpose or not, what matters is that you left!"

"And now that I am finally here you ignore me? Besides, you encouraged me to do it; I don't understand why you should be angry at me!"

"What did you expect me to do!? You were married Ross!" small tears appear in the corner of her eyes but I don't back out, I have to get it all out while I can "It was your decision, you could've stayed but you didn't."

"Trust me, if I could go back in time, I would've done everything differently." She furrows her eyebrows, taken aback. "I mean…I would've tried to find some other to make it work…I just couldn't think straight back then" I sigh "Anyway…maybe you think I don't deserve it but I just want to be friends again, to pick up where we left off. I want to be able to talk with you without feeling like I'm annoying you."

"There's nothing to pick up from, Ross…" she says and I'm not sure whether it is exasperation or sadness what accompanies my name "Don't you realize we are complete strangers?" she asks. "We've missed each other's birthdays, thanksgivings, Christmases. You weren't here when I got a new job, when my father was sick or when I broke a toe….and I have no idea where you live in London, where you work or where you go to take your coffee…four years is too much, Ross." I attempt to hold her hand but she hides them behind her body.

"But I've known you longer than that, Rach, in fact I am pretty sure I know you better than any other person on this planet."

"I've changed."

"I don't think so."

"whatever, that's not the problem, anyway"

"Then what is?"

"The problem is I DON'T want to be friends with you, can you understand that?" she blows up throwing her hands in the air.

"Why?"

"BECAUSE! Because you are going away again! And I won't probably see you in what? Another four years maybe? And let me tell you something, I doubt very much that your wife is okay with us being friends! She has always disliked me, even before you said my name at the altar so I am sure she will do anything and everything possible to keep us apart the moment you return to London! …and then we'll go back to being strangers so what's the point of keeping this alive huh?" A tear rolls down her left cheek and I feel the urge to erase it from her face. But instead I look down and silence falls between us like a heavy rock.

"Maybe I am not going back." I whisper when I finally gather the courage.

"What?" I gaze at her and sigh.

"I'm divorced, Rachel." Her eyes widen and her lips part in surprise although no words come out. "That's what I've been trying to tell you." There it is, the truth is out and the knot that has been suffocating me for so long finally disappears with the revelation.

Tired of standing up and worn off by the intensity of the argument I sit down on the floor while she remains standing, frozen on the spot. I bend my knees and rest my arms there. A long silence follows but I wait until she decides to speak. I grab the bottle of wine and pretend to read the label to avoid my eyes from shedding the tears that have formed in my eyes and which don't allow me to see clearly.

It takes her a few minutes to react and move; she takes off her jacket and sits on it next to me, quietly.

"Are you serious?" she asks almost inaudibly, still beyond astonished. I nod and blink back the tears before daring to look at her.

"Emily and I have been separated for almost a year now…I filed for divorce two months ago."

"Wow…I-" she trails off. She rests her head back on the wall and gazes up at the soft emergency light. She becomes quiet and I would love to be able to hear her thoughts for once. She turns her neck to look at me. "Can I ask what happened?" I shrug off her question.

"It just didn't work out." The pace of our conversation slows down.

"Does Monica know?" I shake my head.

"I haven't told anybody..."

"Why?" I shrug.

"I didn't know how, I left them…you all, for this marriage…"

"God…I just-…a year?" she says incredulous. I nod again. "Why didn't you come back then? You shouldn't have gone through all of that alone"

"Because I was scared it wouldn't be the same with you guys after so long and I would feel left out. Coming back was never in my plans but then Monica called and I couldn't say no"

"I'm sorry I gave you a hard time…" She whispers looking down at her lap. Trembling, I attempt to hold her hand and thankfully she doesn't pull away. I rub it softly.

"Don't be. It's my entire fault. But there's something I want you to know." She lifts her head and eyes me with curiosity. "I am not telling you all of this to change your mind or to jeopardize your relationship. I completely understand that you have a life as well and I honestly could not be happier to know that things are looking up for you. The only thing I ask you is to allow me to be your friend again...just that." a small and adorable smile shows up in her face; a smile that fills me with hope "And I tell you with one hand on my heart that I'm truly glad you found someone who makes you happy, Marco seems like the great guy you deserve, so, if you feel uncomfortable when he and I are in the same room then I'll try to step off whenever I can." I notice her smile suddenly fades at the mention of his name. "I swear I won't tell him anything about our past if that's what you want." She takes her hand away and directs her eyes to her extended legs.

"Well…that won't be necessary because he dumped me yesterday." I freeze. No, I can't be hearing well.

"What?" her lack of answer proves me I did hear well "Wha-what happened?" I can't hide the surprise in my voice. She lets out a puff of air that couldn't have sounded more sarcastic.

"I don't know, apparently me being pregnant is something he did not signed for."

Perplexed, shocked, astounded, scared, sad; that's how I feel all at once._ Did she really say "pregnant"? she's pregnant? _

"You're…pregnant?" I manage to mutter, she looks up at me and I try to find the answer in her eyes, but I can't.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Lots of information in one chapter, huh? Let's see what happens next :P

I am sorry for the delay by the way, it was harder to write this one and sorry again for cutting it here, I want to take my time with the next part. I hope you have enjoyed it.

Again **THANK YOU SOOOO MUCH** to those of you who have left me a message, you help me find inspiration for the story ;) so pleaseee tell me what you think about this chapter, it only takes a few seconds


	7. Chapter 7

**CHAPTER 7 **

"You're…pregnant?" she cracks a smile before letting out a faint sarcastic chuckle.

"No." I frown, completely thrown off.

"Oh…Then…why did you tell him you were?" she holds my gaze for a while as if she was mentally picking the words she wants to say, but then her gaze falls on the bottle of wine I am holding. "Can I have some? I'm kind of thirsty" She asks casually as if my questions had been addressed to someone else. Noticing my lack of reaction she insists, "…I'd drink my water but, it's on you."

"Yeah, Sure, let me just open it for you." I tear the metallic wrap and pull out the cork with the help of my keys. "You'll have to drink from the bottle, though. I didn't think I'd need glasses." I hand it to her.

"That's alright," I observe her as she takes a long gulp. "Thanks" she says as she passes it over to me. I grab the bottle and drink a little of the red liquid; the taste is sweet.

"Ha, not bad, considering I chose it at random."

"Yeah, it's nice." I give her the bottle again and she gladly drinks some more. She then sets the bottle on a side, seemingly having forgotten there was a conversation going on. Through the silence that surrounds us once again I observe her from the corner of my eyes. Her head is resting on the wall and her chin is up high while her eyes are glued to the emergency light above us. She seems sad and I hate that.

"Listen." She lowers her face to look at me. "I completely understand if you don't want to share what's going on in your life with me….and I probably don't know Marco enough to say this but… maybe he wasn't expecting such huge news? He must have freaked out, just give him a couple of days, he'll come around." I try to cheer her up.

"Probably; he's done that before."

"Then I'm sure you'll work things out, I mean…you seem to make each other very happy." I rest my hand over hers and She half smiles at me.

"The thing is…I don't know if I want it to work." She sighs. I cannot help but furrow my brows.

"Why not?"

"Because, I feel like he doesn't care enough about me…that, it's all about him" She says with exasperation "and to answer your question I told him I was pregnant for that reason, to see what his reaction would be, and yeah, I know it's stupid and immature but I proved my point, didn't I? He doesn't give a shit about me." I am more confused now than I already was.

"Wow, I… I'm a little confused here…that's certainly not the impression I got…I mean he seems to be very much in love with you, in fact…he seems more eager to get married than you." I joke but hardly get a small smile out of her.

"That's the problem, the wedding." I notice she says the word with a bit of disgust, or maybe it is just my ears.

"Why?" I inevitably ask. She sighs as if tired of discussing her life.

"It's just…a long story. You don't want to hear it." With that said she grabs the bottle again and downs some more wine. "Here," She offers me the bottle afterwards.

"I'm fine."

"You only took a small sip. Have some!" she encourages.

"I'd rather not."

"Why?"

"Didn't you hear Joey's story the other day?" she arches her eyebrow.

"It was true?" she asks perplexed "I thought he was exaggerating!"

"Not the slightest bit." She breaks into laughter.

"Well, you have to drink anyway; this bottle is too much for just me."

"No way, I promised myself I'd stay away from alcohol, at least until someone else top my embarrassing moment, which is unlikely."

"C'mon!" she insists, pushing the bottle towards me. I narrow my eyes.

"You want to see me sing I Will Survive, don't you?" I lighten the mood with a joke. Rachel giggles.

"I won't deny I'd love to see that. But c'mon! you won't expect me to drink this all by myself, you have to help me, or I'll be the one dancing I Will Survive in the middle of the street." She adds giggling. I smile at the sound of her laughter.

"Alright, give me." I take a couple of gulps of the sweet liquid. "Just so you know, you'll be the only one to blame if I do something stupid tonight." I warn, pointing at her with my index. She lifts her right hand and puts a straight face.

"I hereby take full responsibility." I chuckle and that charming smile of her shines on her face. I love how, for the first time since I am back, making eye contact and making jokes with her doesn't feel awkward. However, it isn't long before she turns her face and looks straight ahead, taking a deep breath. I glance at my watch. It's been thirty five minutes since we got in that elevator.

"They are not rushing to get us out, apparently" I say to prevent silence, because silence leads to thinking, and thinking makes me aware of where I am and my fear.

"Yeah, god I can't believe I'm missing a blackout soap opera party!" She whines. "What do you think they are doing up there right now?"

"I have an idea of what Joey may be doing…"

"Ew! You think he would do that with all his colleagues near?"

"Unless he has changed in the eight months I haven't seen him…I'm pretty sure he's hooking up with a woman right now." She pulls a face.

"He wouldn't do that…" her voice trails off.

"I bet you another bottle of wine that he has"

"Deal, BUT just during the blackout, afterwards doesn't count."

"No problem." We seal the deal with a shake of hands. Her soft lean fingers brush my palm as she slowly slides her hand off mine. She sends me a smile before tearing her eyes from me.

"Anyway…" she smoothes out her dress and looks up again. "Hopefully we'll be able to find out soon."

"Yeah…"

"Ross…Can I ask you something?" she asks after a while.

"Sure." She hesitates for a moment.

"Do you still believe in marriage?"

"Yes" I reply right away.

"Really? Even after two divorces?" I bring my hand to my chest, faking pain.

"Ouch, that hurt," she playfully slaps my shoulder.

"You know I didn't mean it that way."

"I know, I know…but my answer is still yes." Rachel smiles, pensive. "Any reason why you're asking that?"

"No, I just wanted to know if going through two divorces makes you kinda lose hope..."

"Well, I want to believe the end of my first marriage wasn't my fault but my ex-wife's sexual preferences…and the second one…it was just wrong from the very beginning. This only proves that I am a horrible decision maker." She laughs softly "So, no, I haven't lost hope. Each marriage is different, some last, some don't. But don't worry, yours will be better, at least you know your partner longer than a month."

"I love how you refer to "my marriage" as a fact when Marco and I have just broken up" She says between chuckles.

"You'll get back together….that was just a small bump in the road." She tilts her head unconvinced. "Do you love him?" I ask before I even think it.

"Of course, I do love him."

"Then?"

"It's complicated…"

"You can tell me, maybe I can help you." I tell her, trying to seem concerned but I am more curious than anything else.

"I don't want to tell you."

"Why?"

"Because you'll think less of me once I do." I can't help laughing.

"It can't be THAT bad"

"Yes it is, at least the reason why we got together in the first place." I nod quietly, not to give away my deep curiosity. Thankfully I don't have to ask again. "You know Marco's dad is the owner of a well-known Italian clothing brand, right?"

"I've heard." I said nodding.

"I didn't know that until we were on our first date. We met at a conference in Boston; he was sitting next to me and we talked for hours and got along very quickly. Since we were staying in the same hotel we coincided a few times over the weekend. By the end of that weekend he invited me to a coffee and there he told me he could offer me a great job at Ralph Lauren…if I went on a date with him. I thought he was just trying to pick me up but he was handsome and interesting, and I had nothing to lose so I said yes." I listen intently to every word. "Well, on that date he told me who he was. I didn't believe him at first since I didn't understand how the son of the owner would have such low position in the company but then he told me that his father was quite hard on him. He refuses to promote him and he constantly tells him that he won't inherit the company unless he gets married." She takes a deep breath "Anyway, long story short, Marco said he could get me a nice job at Ralph Lauren, an apartment in Park Avenue and whatever I asked for if I agreed to marry him." She looks back at me "and I accepted." I remain quiet for a moment, digesting the unexpected information. " I said I would marry him if he first gave us two years to get to know each other." She looks at me as if waiting for my opinion.

"Wow, I…I'm quite surprised, I mean, why would someone like Marco, who is attractive and a nice man, need to "buy" a wife?" I quote with my fingers, praying that she won't get offended by the expression.

"He told me he had had a few bad relationships and didn't want to risk his future; he wanted to make sure he had a marriage secured" I raise my eyebrows, still shocked by the real Marco "You must be thinking I'm an awful person…" I shake my head.

"Why would I, You love each other, don't you? It doesn't matter how it all started because it worked out in the end."

"Yeah…but those two years are over and all he does is talk and talk about the wedding, how can I be sure he loves me for real and doesn't just want me to be able to inherit the company, huh?" I shrug my shoulders.

"You'll have to talk to him."

"I guess…but I don't know, I'm sick of this situation…" I can't stand the sadness and frustration that cover her eyes so I decide to change the topic instead of asking more questions to feed my curiosity.

"Anyway, I think this deserves a toast." She arches her eyebrows bemused. I raise the bottle and meet her eyes. "To our miserable love lives." she smiles amused.

"Cheers." She adds, banging her hand against the bottle and before we know it, the bottle is rolling empty on the floor.

(…)

"I'm telling you, I can't do that!"

"But it's so easy, you only have to push one downwards and the other upwards and then you cross them."

"You're a freak."

"What?" she chuckles.

"No other person can cross their toes like that."

"That's because they don't practice yoga; you should do yoga, your toes are practically disabled."

"What are you talking about? They're perfectly fine."

"Yeah? Try separating them." She challenges, giving me a you-can't-do-it stare.

"Watch." I lean forward and separate my bare toes with my own hands. Rachel bursts out laughing as she hits my shoulder with her palm, pushing me forward and almost making me lose my balance.

"That's cheating!" we giggle, maybe a little too much due to the alcohol we've consumed. She smiles giddily. "This feels nice."

"What? The wine? It sure does."

"No silly! This! Being with you again." Sighing, she rests her head on my shoulder and a breeze of her coconut scent inundates my nose. I close my eyes, wishing I could hug her and fill my lungs with that familiar smell. No words are shared for a while, but it feels nice and I don't have any space in my mind for fear, other than knowing this moment will end soon. "I've missed you" She murmurs, accommodating her head on my shoulder. I turn my neck and find her lips and eyes smiling at me. "Waaaaay, waaay too much." I know that it is the alcohol talking but I can't help the grin that forms in my face.

"I've missed you too." I lean down to kiss her forehead but just then she lifts her head and my lips end up kissing the tip of her nose. I freeze, waiting for her to pull back and yell at me, but she doesn't. Instead, she gives me that look that had always led to an amazing kiss before. I close my eyes; tempted to get closer nonetheless I keep still, feeling her breathing caressing my lips.

It takes me all the strength in my body to pull back and, when I do, bright lights blind me and the elevator begins to move again. It takes us a few seconds to react.

"Finally!" I exclaim awkwardly, both happy and disappointed. I put my socks and shoes back on and so does she. We simultaneously stand up and make the rest of the way up in silence.

* * *

"Hey! You finally made it!" Joey greets us as soon as he opens the door.

"Hi!"

"Come in,"

"What did you do during the blackout? It must've brought the party down" I ask as we walk in. The apartment is packed with people. There is a bar on the right side of the living room and burned candles are everywhere.

"Better ask, who did I do in the blackout?" Joey says with a grin and winking his eye at me. Grinning, I immediately look at Rachel who gives a roll of eyes. "See that blonde near the balcony? We did it in the bathroom fifteen minutes ago." He says proudly.

"I hope I don't need to use that bathroom." Rachel whispers near my ear as we follow Joey inside.

"Hey!" Monica appears among the crowd.

"How did you beat us here?"

"I got out of work sooner, why did it take you so long?"

"My fault" Rachel says lifting her hand. "I wasn't ready."

"Shocking" Rachel sticks out her tongue at her.

"Where are the rest?" She asks while scanning the room. "Oh my god! Is that Scott Bailey?" she exclaims gaping at an unfamiliar man across the room.

"Yes baby! And Phoebe is talking with Zach Conroy!" Monica cries "They are out in the balcony, let's join them!" Monica grabs Rachel's hand and pulls of her. They disappear before I even have the chance to follow them. Joey has also disappeared from my sight so I'm left alone. In normal circumstances I would've called it a night but I decide to stay, holding onto the possibility of spending more time with her.

(...)

"Dude, what are you doing here alone?" I hear Joey's voice from behind. I turn on my stool, getting a little dizzy in the process.

"Just enjoying some good beer." I grin.

"How many of those have you had?" I hesitate.

"Three, wait no…four!"

"Well, stop drinking and go talk to some women, enjoy the party!"

"I'm fine here."

"C'mon dude! What happened to you? the fact that you're married doesn't mean you have to be antisocial. Join me in the balcony; I'm going to introduce you to some interesting people."

"Alright, Let me just finish this and I'll be right over."

"Okay, hurry!" he disappears and I take the time to scan the room while I drink the remains of my beer. The apartment is even more crowded than before and loud music is playing. I soon spot Rachel across the place, laughing and talking very closely to a handsome man, probably another famous actor. As if having felt my eyes on her she turns and we lock gazes. Although she keeps talking to the man her eyes don't leave me, and for some reason that makes my cheek burn. I take the last gulp and set the bottle on the counter, when I look back, Rachel is walking in my direction.

I'm sorry for the wait! I kind of had a writer's block with this one and I'm still not totally satisfied with the result but I didn't want to make you wait anymore so here it is, I hope you liked it.

**For all my faithful readers: I am afraid to say that the next few updates will not come as often. I've gotten a new job and I'm soon moving to another country and I'm changing my whole life basically so it will be a while till I get back on track, but I promise I won't leave the fic; I haven't left any of my other stories unfinished and this will not be the exception. I just hope you stick around! **

Chamucos – you're good at guessing! Haha indeed, Rachel wasn't pregnant. Any guesses of what will happen next? ;) I know, I thought writing from Ross' point of view would be interesting but it is hard and weird writing certain scenes. But I guess I'll keep it this way, changing perspectives now would be confusing for everybody.

CrayolaCreation- I'm sorry Marco reminds you of Macro haha

**The rest of you, THANK YOU for leaving a review, you're my inspiration! Keep them coming please.**


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